Day 9


Tokens.Scrimmages.Controversy.Blackmail.Freezing.Night Out.Poison.Morgue.London.Home.Lightning.

It feels like I’ve been in America for months, I like to think that I’ve adjusted pretty quickly. I’m still not thinking of dollars as money, more as like, tokens for food and drink, as that’s all I’ve spent money on. Except for my trainers, which are still superb.

I umpired some scrimmages, which translates to refereeing some games.

Controversy was ripe throughout the first match, a borderline offside call which Ref Josh didn’t see because he was swatting a fly out of his face tainted an otherwise excellent performance. The pinks beat the oranges 6-1. There were 2 sisters who ran the show.

(I’ve chosen this picture as she deserves it, little blackmailing bitch)

The second game was odd. Every time one team tackled the other they’d apologise for hurting the other team. One girl got the ball smashed in her chops. I laughed. Nobody heard me giggle except one girl called Sophia. Sophia made me say the following things as means of blackmail so she wouldn’t tell her coach: “Banana”, “I like hamburgers”, “my favourite member of One Direction is Zayn.” She tried to make me say “I love Harry Styles” but that wasn’t worth my while. Sophia looked like a young version of this person:

I skyped my parents for the first time since being here, Kate gave them a tour of the house after Brathleen talked to them, I think they’d get on really well if they were both in the same country. It was nice to finally speak to them, even if my face did keep on freezing in odd positions.

Alan, Adam, Jake and I went out to Naperville for a night out.

There is a drink called Four Loco which we had, it is 13cl of flavoured poison. When we bought it a man in the off-licence said “Woah man, that shit’s gonna kill you”, he was right.
We played Non-Alcoholic Beverage Pong (NABP) and again I became intoxicated, not sure how this keeps on happening.

Naperville has bars instead of clubs, but after we had the drinks we did we could party in a morgue and it would still have been good. Mind you, the girls in the morgue would have probably been more attractive than the munters we came across, except for red dress girl… Alan’s caption below is in no way affiliated with my beliefs, all girls are beautiful to me xxxxxxxx

Drinks were roughly the same as a night out in London. This cost a fortune:

Adam and I got in a girl’s car for a 30 minute drive home, we got out of the car and we were in the same place we started, neither of us know how it happened.

I have never got so drenched, heard such loud thunder and seen more flashes of lightning as I did that night as well.



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